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Your partner has been asking about anal sex – A LOT. You’re curious, but just not sure. You’ve heard so many things, and you’re feeling a little uncomfortable. What’s it really like? What’s myth versus reality? Back up a second, while we break down the 4 most common misconceptions about anal sex.
Misconception #1 – Anal sex will hurt
While many people who are trying anal sex for the first time do experience some discomfort, the key factor in avoiding pain is to be prepared! When venturing into anal, rule number one is – lube, lube, lube (and more lube)! Lubricant is key to making every sexual experience more pleasurable, and particularly when it comes to anal sex, because the anus and rectal tissues can’t produce lubricant naturally the way a vagina would. It’s essential to use a substantial amount of lube during anal sex in order to avoid unpleasant friction.
So – do you want to use a water-based or silicon-based lube? While there is no hard and fast answer when it comes to lube-type and anal sex, our experts recommend a silicone-based lubricant, as they are often thicker and last longer water-based lubes. This is important during anal sex to ensure you remain comfortable throughout the duration of the act. Some of our favourite silicone-based lubes for anal include ‘bedroom tested, doctor recommended’ Astroglide Diamond Silicone Gel Lubricant and Gun Oil Silicone Lubricant. Both of these bestselling lubricants are safe for use with condoms, which is definitely something you want to always look for when choosing your lube and condoms.
Suggester Read: How to Choose The Right Lube for You & Your Partner
Misconception #2 – If it hurt the first time, it will always hurt
When in comes to avoiding discomfort during anal sex, a major factor aside from using enough lubricant, is simply adjusting to the new sensation. Ultimately, many find anal sex incredibly pleasurable; however allowing yourself (and your body) to relax and get comfortable with the feeling of anal sex can take time. Our best advice is to start slow. Begin experimenting with fingers and then advance towards using a training kit, like the Adam & Eve Anal Training Kit which offers three different sizes of soft black TRP plugs to let you start off small and gradually work your way up to big pleasure.
Another thrilling addition when experimenting with anal play is to try anal beads. Created centuries ago in the Orient, anal beads are a fun way to increase your tolerance and enjoyment of anal sex. Women: a little trick to get you relaxed is to stimulate your clitoris during anal penetration. This will encourage a pleasure over pain response.
Misconception # 3 – Anal sex is dirty (literally)
This is one of the biggest misconceptions out there. While the anus and the rectum can contain trace amounts of fecal matter, with proper washing prior to engaging in anal play this is a non-issue. For a squeaky clean backend, try using an anal douche, like the Adam & Eve Anal Douche prior to penetration.
The most important element of cleanliness here is ensuring that you don’t go immediately from the anal intercourse to vaginal intercourse, as you will transfer bacteria that can cause urinary tract infections and pose other risks. When switching to vaginal sex post anal, ensure you use an antimicrobial soap and clean the area thoroughly
Misconception #4 – you don’t need to use a condom
A very common and dangerous misconception, because there is no risk of pregnancy, many lovers believe that condoms are not necessary during anal sex. However, the risks for STIs are as great as with vaginal sex. HPV, HIV, chlamydia, gonorrhea and herpes can all be transmitted through anal sex. You should always wear a condom to protect your health and your partner’s health. One of our top condom recommendations for anal sex is the Beyond Seven Aloe Condom, which includes a special aloe lubricant to relieve discomfort during penetration. Explore a variety of condom options for anal sex.
Suggested Read: Anal Sex 101 - Choose Wisely, Stay Safe, Have Fun
Bonus tip: A little rimming can be a lot of fun, but to protect yourself from the transmission of bodily fluids, bacteria, harmful germs and sexually transmitted infections during analingus, consider wearing a dental dam, such as the Sheer Glide Dental Dams Sampler Pack.
If you’re new to the intriguing world of anal sex, just remember a few things – go slow, be prepared, and communicate with your partner about what’s in your comfort zone and what isn’t.